Walking Away

Oh little blog, I am still here, I swear. I have felt uninspired to write lately, probably due to the heavy load that’s been weighing me down for weeks. I am, in a word, stuck. After 11 years in my chosen field of veterinary medicine, I’ve hit the (already low) ceiling as a vet tech and like so many before me, I am thoroughly burned out. I no longer love my job. In fact, most days, I hate it. For those who don’t know, being a veterinary technician is one of the most thankless jobs in existence. You get shit on (both literally and figuratively) on a daily basis and are generally compensated with crap pay. The work is back-breaking, mine especially, and the respect is largely non-existent. I’m tired of breaking my body for such little return. In the beginning, it was “for the animals” and that was enough. But now I’m older and wiser. And I’m ready to walk away.

The thought of this is both incredibly freeing and immensely terrifying. I am not really qualified to do much else. I do have a bachelors degree (in journalism, for what it’s worth) but I received said degree ELEVEN YEARS ago. Ugh, that is so depressing. Eleven years I’ve spent since undergrad, toiling away in an unrelated field (I went to vet tech school the year after I finished undergrad) that provided me only marginal upward mobility. I’m terrified that I’m too poor to do anything else but too physically broken to continue. Hence, stuck.

I’m doing my damndest to get unstuck, though. I’ve been combing the internet for inspiration, searching job listings on Idealist, trying to get a sense of what I want to do. I’ve settled on nutrition with a concentration on public health (or vice versa depending on a few factors). Unfortunately, this requires going back to school. And not just going back but playing some serious catch up. As a journalism major, I wasn’t required to take any heavy math or science courses. Thus, I ended up with Geology 101 and some sort of half-assed college level math course on my transcript. I would likely need to pick up a minimum of 8 courses (one of them being *gulp* ORGANIC CHEMISTRY) before even applying to a masters program, and that’s provided I don’t go down in flames with the GRE. Oh, and I haven’t even factored in the financial impact or scheduling nightmare I would have ahead of me. You see my hesitation here?

Somehow, though, in spite of all the doubt and fear, I feel a little hopeful. Even though the way out seems impossible right now, I know that there is one. I don’t have to waste my life at a job I’ve grown to hate. The question is, will I?

2 responses to “Walking Away

  1. I hear you on being stuck.

    My best friend created her own side-business preparing & packaging vegan meals for busy friends (several of whom are not even vegan!). I wonder if you would enjoy combining something like that with your journalism education — like a blog where you share food ideas, create interesting content by chasing down vegan foodies/stories, create customer interest, and get some advertising revenue?

    Just idea-ing at you. I am trying to move toward becoming my own boss, so I think about this kind of stuff a lot.🙂

    • Thanks for the idea-ing! I’m actually not terribly concerned that I’ve never put my BS to use though I wouldn’t mind being able to guest blog about various vegan health issues. It’s the health and nutrition aspect that interests me more than the cooking, hence the need to go back to school. I would love to be able to have my own business, though, doing nutritional consulting for vegans or those wanting to go vegan, as well as with people like me with chronic illnesses.

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